Every day that I live...

• Plans change, marriages fail, children die, and so many other horrific experiences that we call life, can change in an instant. Life isn't always fair, but the only person who controls your reactions to life, is you. I have heard it said, life is 10 % what happens to you and 90% of your attitude about the 10 %. Every day that I live the scripture "man that is born of woman, is a few days and full of trouble" is becoming more real to me.
• Has my attitude towards life always been what it should have been, NO, a thousand times no. I have been to the bottom of the pit. I have been to the top of the mountain. I have gone through the valley of the shadow of death. It's amazing sometimes how our emotions can go from one extreme to the other, even in a short span of time. But been there, done that, and will most likely do it again. Feeling is part of healing. The more we try to push down, don't respond, don't feel, the sorrows of our life, the longer it takes to heal. My consolation in this is another scripture. "yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, thou art with me" and "he knoweth our frame, he knoweth we are but dust" This helps me to know, God understands my frailties and that he will go with me wherever this life takes me.
• Hopefully you are seeing a theme in this post. There have been too many sorrows I couldn't avoid, and if I could, I would have. But the Word of our God, His comfort of the Spirit, His unfailing love and sustaining grace, has been my mainstay. If it had not been for the Lord on my side, tell me where would I be, where would I be? Is the Lord on my side when I am wrong, of course not! However if my heart will repent and turn to him again, he has been gracious to forgive and pardon all my sin. Pulling yourself up by the boot straps, humbling to your wrongs and making them right is what keeps me on the straight and narrow. With all my heart, after this life, I want to hear him say "Well done"
• There is another scripture that presses on me today. "Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children;" I loved being a wife and mother. Truly had no desire to be anything else, because it's the highest calling on this earth for a woman. God instituted the family for good and when it works according to God's plan, it's like having a taste of heaven here on earth. It troubles me to see women of today, who resent the responsibility of their children. Mine and Charlie's life revolved around our girls. He wasn't able to come to some of the things I wanted him to, because he felt the need to provide above and beyond what was needed. The tone that is used to talk to their own children, name calling and sheer neglect causes me a heartache I can't explain. Was I a perfect mother, well I wouldnt be telling the truth if I said I was. However, with the skills I had, I know that I tried my best to be there and care and teach my children the ways of the Lord. My heart was totally in it. In sorrow thou shalt bring forth children, boy does that last a lifetime. When they are young they need so much from you to be able to eventually survive on their own. Time, love, affection, talking to them, being with them doing nothing, tells children, I am important to you. There are so many distractions to keep us from the people God will hold us accountable for. Turn it off, tune it out and listen to heart needs of those precious babies before it's too late. What priority is any greater than building strong relationships with the people inside your 4 walls? NONE! I pray today God awakens a new desire in each one of us to turn toward the people God has placed in our homes. The sorrows of child rearing, is your heart wants what is best for them till the last breath you draw. Watching your children make wrong choices, become people you didn't teach that way, that is where the sorrow comes from. Knowing the consequences of God's word, knowing the enemy doesn't wait till they are older to get a hold of their hearts for a lifetime. It's not the love of your children that causes sorrow, it's the not being able to change their direction when you see them failing in areas, that is going to cost them big time. Maybe if they were my rules I would want to bend them for the sake of my children. But that is why God is God, he loves us enough to say, this is where the line is and if you or anyone else crosses it, there WILL be consequences. He doesn't cave for anyone and I want to please him so much. There are needs in my life that only God can fix. If I fail to do what is right according to his Word, then I just tied his hands to do anything for me. Just like when your child refuses to obey, you don't reward bad behavior, you don't give in, because if you do, your saying the bad behavior is ok. So God in his great love and wisdom, lets us decide what we are going to do. Right brings blessings, right because it's right and no other reason. Wrong brings cursing and I don't know about you, but I've seen enough cursed lives to last me a lifetime already. I desperately need to be in right standing with God. It's just simple "if you will do all I say do, you will be a special people unto me above all people on the face of the earth and I will be your God" And that is all I have ever wanted. A family who loves God first, then each other and serves the Lord together.